Quintessence of my Daidouji-san

My Daidouji-san is a walking statement of contradiction. You may see her stroll around the campus with a sunny smile on her face, greeting you with the warmest of hellos when you barely know her.

But deep inside, her heart is crying, her emotions in a storm.

You may see her act with so much energy and enthusiasm, involving herself in various extracurricular activities like the school choir and wardrobe consultancy in school plays, but she's doing all of these just to not allow herself any time to think about her best friend.

Dear Sakura Kinomoto who didn't know how much her best friend meant it when she said "I love you."

Sometimes I want to talk to Daidouji-san about her pains, coax her to show what she really feels and to not just bottle up her emotions. Heavens, I just want to see her cry even for once! She need not suffer alone!

But my Daidouji-san is too kind and selfless to show that she's a human too. She masks her problems and sorrows with that smile which is a bit too cheerful. She would rather be the one that people will run to for advice rather than be the one to seek one herself.

She runs away from her problems but while running, she carries the burden of the problems of other people.

My Daidouji-san is what people refer to as the perfect epitome of immutable goodness. She is the person everyone loves to love and hate to hate. Nothing goes wrong for the only daughter of the wealthy Daidouji family. She can sing very well, she's a popular campus figure and she has both brains and beauty. What else will a girl like her ask for?

So my poor Daidouji-san carries her masquerade everyday, pretending that life is good and that she wants nothing more. But if you will only care to take a closer look at her amethyst eyes, you will see it i not so.

I see sorrow.

Now that Sakura has found another person to love, she has lost time for her.

Frustration.

Everyday she sees her best friend happy, but it's not because of her. She can never give the happiness she sees in Sakura's face the way Li Syaoran does.

Envy.

Deep inside her, she wishes someone would love her the way Li does. She wants to feel how Sakura feels. She wants to feel loved.

I can sense her guilt for feeling that way because she promised herself that she will be happy because her best friend is happy.

My poor Daidouji-san.

She doesn't know what to feel anymore.

If only she can let me help her.

I looked down at the petals of plum blossoms on my hand. If only she can give me the chance to show her how wonderful it is to love and be loved.

In a way, my Daidouji-san is just like me. We both are great actors on the great stage, everyone believing our acts.

We are happy. We ARE happy.

"Hiragizawa-kun?"

I turned to see Tomoyo looking at me. "G-Good morning, Daidouji-san."

"You don't look too well. Is something bothering you?" she asked, concerned.

I smiled. "I was thinking about you."

"M-Me?"

"Yes. Do you want to see a movie tonight?"

"Alright, what's going on?" she looked at me suspiciously.

I shrugged and beamed innocently. "Nothing. I'm just in a good mood, that's all."

She blinked. "Oh, I get it! It's your birthday tomorrow, right?"

I laughed. "So?"

"That's not the reason?" she looked puzzled.

I shook my head. "No,I just want to go out, that's all."

"That's all?"

I laughed. "Of course! Will there be any other reason, Daidouji-san?"

She blushed. "Eriol-kun!!"

"I should tease you more often. You're beginning to call me by my first name. Very nice, Daidouji-san." I said.

"Keep on doing that and I will not give you my birthday gift." she pouted.

"Really? Where?"

She showed me a gift wrapped box. "This is not exactly your personality, but I found it cute."

"Cute is part of my personality." I carefully opened the gift. It revealed an angel made of porcelain. My smile vanished.

"Y-You didn't like it?" she asked, uncertainty in her voice.

"I love it." I said softly.

She blushed again. "L-Look, I gotta go. My choir teacher is waiting for me."

"I will fetch you tonight at 7, ok?" I asked.

She nodded.

Later I looked at the porcelain angel. This is the quintessence of Tomoyo Daidouji: beautiful, precious and tough-looking but fragile.

I sighed.

My Daidouji-san. She's one in a million, and I do love her very much.